Thursday, February 13, 2014

The Fight for the Pilot

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Sometimes you just don't know where to start... the consequence to not properly writing a sequence of events as they occur.   This means I have to give you a brief history first before I get to tell you about today's events:

October 29th, 2013:  Noah was denied for an adaptive crawler device called the Krabat Pilot Crawling System.  A request that we had made to better assist Noah learning to crawl, bear weight through his arms and legs, and continue strengthening his arms, and legs, while giving his hips the proper assistance they need.  Noah has tried a product called the Creepster Crawler, and while it comes with a considerably less price tag, the Creepster Crawler suspended Noah from a cage-like frame with a harness offering him really little support for his hips and legs, and didn't really offer Noah the momentum that he needed to propel forward.  The Pilot's design if very different in nature allowing the trunk of child to rest on a platform.

Krabat Pilot Crawling Device


November 15, 2013:  After receiving the Medicaid denial notice in the mail and after speaking with the Durable Medical Equipment provider (DME), I filed my appeals letter and request for a court telephone hearing.  I knew I would likely need to provide an Administrative Judge with additional information to give consideration to forcing Medicaid to fund this for Noah, so I researched information online, obtained a secondary recommendation letter from his primary care provider and therapist, to demonstrate medical necessity.

December 17, 2013:  I receive a Notice of Hearing from the Court indicating a scheduled telephone hearing and and Notice indicating that a Evidence Packet must be mailed no later than five days prior to the hearing.

January 6, 2014:  I receive a call from an individual representing themselves as a officer of the Court, and coordinated a date with me for a telephone conference.

January 13, 2014:  Telephone conference occurred, but it was not with the Court or an officer of the Court, but a Medicaid caseworker, who attempted to coax and encourage me not to follow the Court's Notice of Hearing outlining if I had any additional documentation to support the appeal that I email it or mail it to her immediately so that she had sufficient time to get it to her doctors and experts to refute my information and position.

February 1, 2014:  I mailed my additional information to the Court, ignoring the representative who lied about being a Court employee and tried to coax me into providing her information not in accordance with the Notice of Hearing. (Why on earth would I help them find a stronger way to deny my child something he needs?)

February 11, 2014: I receive the Appellee's Evidence Packet in the mail (certificate of mailing indicating 2-7-14).  Containing Exhibits A-E, including a CV from an expert who had no experience in pediatric medicine, rehabilitation medicine, or neurology; who resides in Oklahoma and is contracted/employed with a company called APS HealthCare.  This company contracts with Colorado Medicaid providers to offer expert services at hearings to support why a child should be denied something requested through Medicaid funding.  Other Exhibits contained an Aggregate Episode summary, which in short is a series of notes between a nurse, and a doctor for Medicaid, offering their reasoning for a denial, a price guide for the item requested, the letter of medical necessity and recommendation from Noah's doctor submitted by the DME, and my additional letters from his doctor and therapist.

And that brings me to today (February 13, 2014)  The Telephone Hearing:
Hopefully I haven't lost you yet, but I think it's only fair to give you a perspective of the timeline of events on this kind of thing. 

The telephone call was right on time, although there was a few minutes to set up the conference call between a third-way party.  If you have ever experienced a typical judicial hearing, then you can imagine what this was really like.  It's very typical where the Judge asks all parties to introduce themselves into the record, the party testifying is sworn in,  the Appellee puts on their case first, then you have a chance to cross-examine, the Judge asks his own set of questions, and then you basically call yourself to testify representing your child... etc.  (if you decide not to fill out the cute little Non-Attorney Authorization form which indicates no one is assisting you through this process).   Given our current legal bills regarding Noah's case and appeals for his medical malpractice, we know that we are really on our own for things like this - however I wouldn't discourage anyone from finding legal counsel to assist you through something like this.  In fact, think it would be highly beneficial to have an advocate/legal counsel on your side assisting with this process.

This was Medicaid's basis for Noah's denial:
1) Product is recommended by the equipment vendor as "Up to Age 5" (denied that Noah was 2 months away from age 5 at the time of the request)
2) Because they did not have knowledge if Noah had tried the product with success.
3) Because they did not have information if Noah possessed head/trunk control.
4) No knowledge of other products trialed or considered.
(NOTE the denial was denied for NON-MEDICAL NECESSITY).

The cliff notes of the hearing:  The expert admits he has no experience in anything pediatric or rehabilitative medicine and is simply contracted to serve as an expert in this capacity; admits never read Noah's medical files, never met him, knows nothing about him; refuses to answer exactly how much he was paid for his time to review Noah's denial, make a recommendation to the court and testify, just would say only that he is contracted with hourly pay on many cases at the same time and estimated an hour of his time to Noah's denial.  (One can only hope that the cost of his services are less than what it would have been to actually just approve this piece of equipment for Noah).  Personally I take great issue with the fact that you can spend dollars fighting against what a child needs for daily living rather than just granting the request.  Let's talk about wasting tax payer dollars in that direction!

The expert indicates that we had the ability to have Noah's doctor submit additional information after a denial but they failed to do so because the DME (NuMotion) failed to go back to the doctor and request more information.  Which is really typical of most DME's.  They simply lay it back up on the shoulders of the parents to go through the appeals process.  And in fact until today, I didn't even know that they had the ability to go back to a doctor for more information to potentially avoid the necessity of a court hearing.   But between you and me, even if one takes that route and attempts to get further clarification from a doctor after a denial, I'm not sure how successful that avenue would really be - after all when they dig in their heals and decide not to pay for something they stand pretty firm on that unless there is something legally twisting their hand otherwise. The expert even admitted that Noah's doctor's additional letter after the denial didn't change his mind on medical necessity - which is rather proof in the pudding that it wouldn't have mattered if they sought additional information from a doctor prior to us requesting a court hearing.   At least I learned something new for the future - as I anticipate this won't be my last rodeo with fighting for Noah's needs.  The expert tried to use a recent request for an i2i headrest as proof Noah doesn't have adequate head control for the device, although admits in testimony he can't describe the device as he hasn't seen it.  (For those of you who don't know what an i2i headrest is - it's like a U-shaped headrest that goes around the neck and drapes over the child's shoulders.  Helping a child's head stay mid-line.  We are exploring a power wheelchair for Noah and an i2i headrest is needed to aid him driving - which is another blog post I need to catch you all up on, and doesn't necessary reflect the fact that he cannot hold his head up for short periods of time).

I basically offered testimony to the Court explaining Noah's condition, what his head control was like.  That the weight limit for the product is 55lbs which Noah is not close to yet, and that he is smaller than a typical child at age five just due to having Spastic Quad CP, I introduced my articles that I had provided to the Court - admittedly I stumbled through that as I forgot I needed to address and label them as Exhibits, but in my Defense I don't practice law on a daily basis... I did the best I could in the moment.  I tried to offer the Court the best clear picture I could of Noah's capabilities and the potential this product could offer him.  The hearing lasted an hour and a half, the Judge seemed thorough with both sides.  He will issue his written order in twenty days.   Did I do well enough to fight for Noah?  I don't know.  I hope I did.  It's nerve wrecking.  Makes your heart flutter and your palms get all sweaty.  Both from a combination of nerves and agitation that you even have to go through all this for a child with special needs.   In hindsight you always wonder, should I have mentioned this?  Would that information have made any difference?  Did I miss something crucial in cross-examination of the expert while I'm writing down notes feverishly?...

But the point is, whether I won or lost this battle I tried.  I got up today.  And I fought for a little boy named Noah.  And God that's what counts.  I'm not a quitter.  And I'll give my last breath to help this child.  And in the meantime I will wait patiently these twenty days and just say some prayers. 

Love,




Noah's Miracle by Stacy Warden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Friday, February 7, 2014

WHEN YOU THOUGHT I WASN'T LOOKING In The Eyes of a Special Needs Sibling

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When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you feeding my
brother patiently spoonful after spoonful, and I instantly
I learned the true meaning of unconditional love.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you catch and release
a spider outside, and I learned that every life has value.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you lift
my brother's wheelchair, and I learned that everyone
needs a little help.

When you thought I wasn't looking I heard you say a
prayer, and I knew that there is a God I could always
talk to, and I learned to trust in Him to see me through
the hard times in life.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you correct an
impolite stranger who called my brother a cripple,
and I learned the meaning of acceptance.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you going
to countless therapy sessions for my brother and I
learned the true meaning of hard work.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw how you
handled challenging situations and set backs and I
learned how to persevere.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw tears come
from your eyes, and I learned that sometimes things
hurt, but it's all right to cry.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you modify
things to make it work for my brother when you were
denied help and I learned ways to adapt and overcome.

When you thought I wasn't looking I learned most of
life's lessons that I needed to know by watching you
be a loving, kind, and unselfish person.

When you thought I wasn't looking I looked at you and
wanted to say,'Thanks for all the things I saw when
you thought I wasn't looking.'




Noah's Miracle by Stacy Warden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Snow Day

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We took Noah out in the backyard for the first time to try out his special needs Cerebra Sled.  Noah has never loved the snow, the cold weather, or the glare of bright white surroundings, but as soon as we strapped him in his 5 point harness sled, his face lit up with a big smile and the laughter followed.   This sled was a huge hit with Noah.  His dad just did circles in the yard.   Noah was all bundled up like a giant ball of fabric, having the best time ever.



This sled is amazing!  It glides perfectly through the snow.  It was easy to load Noah into it and buckle him in - even with gloves on.  It has a good center of gravity and didn't tip to either side.   People might think that fundraising for a special needs sled is a waste of time and energy, but to see him be able to participate in a simple winter activity that typical children do, means so much - to him and to us as his parents.  We want Noah to be able to participate in everyday activities the best that he can.  To enjoy life, to find laughter and pleasure in all aspects of play. 



We had hoped to build a snowman, but our temperatures have been too low for long-term exposure outside, so we had our ten minutes of fun and came in.   The perfect snowman still awaits and since we can't seem to catch a break from the snow I'm sure we'll have plenty of more opportunities later on. 

Noah's county services inquired about some of our out of pocket costs last year - when I told them about the purchase of Noah's sled I got a big laugh on the other end of the line, followed by "what for?"   I rarely am able to think of quick comeback for people's off the wall assumptions when it comes to children with special needs and the perception that they can't possibility join their peers in regular activities.  

But after the fact I would have told this caseworker, about all the health benefits that winter play can offer a child:  Things like being outdoors even in winter months, helps reset circadian rhythms (circadian rhythms refer to your unique body rhythms of waking and sleeping in sync with the rising and the setting of the sun, and how the benefits of natural light and fresh air serve to not only improve physical health, but also emotional health.   And bonus it helps Noah with proprioceptive and vestibular sensory input, while also increasing attention , focus, postural stability and gross motor coordination. 

I know that's a lot of therapeutic terms... in short it just means it helps Noah find his center of gravity and improves things like balance, trunk and head control.  And provides Noah the ability to self-calm his spastic tone to aide in more intentional type movements.   So it's not only recreational family play, but yes, built in therapy. 

They of course would disagree and reminded me such items are not worth pursuing or funding.  I'm convinced it's going to take a long time for society as a whole to get up to speed on what truly matters in the day and a life of a child with special needs and the potential of what is possible if they have access to things that make them capable of participation!

Until then, I'll just blog about all of the gains Noah is making as a result of a lot of love and help from others and a parent's mission to find all ways of helping him.

People are kind of like snowflakes. There is no one like us; we all have different skills or designs that make us who we are. P. Eveland







Noah's Miracle by Stacy Warden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Monday, February 3, 2014

Planning to Potty

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Noah has had a flamingo toilet seat for sometime.  Likely over a year in fact, gaining dust in the basement and unable to be used.  I feel there is a large gap for equipment that truly works and that we need for our children in the US.  I see so many amazing products that exist elsewhere and I scratch my head each and everyday wondering why don't we have that here?  There seems to be only a handful of products to chose from and unfortunately you're often forced to pick the lesser of evils when you know your child needs something but it likely isn't going to be the right fit.

The smallest flamingo didn't fit Noah.  He has a very tiny bum.  And he'd just fall through the center, causing him not only pain but marks on his inner thighs.  We, spent countless hours trying to add foam to it and buying typical toddler potty inserts - but to no avail.  Nothing worked and nothing fixed the problem.  When we explored a custom molded seat for Noah's wheelchair late last year, we were told about the option of making a custom insert that would sit inside the flamingo potty seat.  We thought it was worth a try.  Many hours and several appointments later, Noah's custom potty seat was completed.  Medicaid will only provide a 12 month limit on it - which means if Noah outgrows the mold in 13 months we'll have ask Medicaid to fund another mold.   With his custom wheelchair seat we only have to ask Medicaid for permission to fund and replace it every three years, regardless of growth or how many molds he'll need during those three years.


You might be wondering how exactly do you go about potty training a child that cannot sit, walk, talk, crawl or self feed.  It's going to be tricky but not impossible.  Like with any child you give them lots of opportunities to sit on the potty and with time we're hopeful Noah will be able to give us a signal, whether that be tugging on a bracelet that he'll wear or looking at something that will tell us he needs to go.  I'm not going to sugar coat it - it could take me a while.  Maybe a year, maybe more.  But we know Noah is capable we just have to figure out his terms.   I must say that Noah is rather proud to be sporting big boy britches over his diaper.  He's really proud of himself.

I am glad that Noah had the basic foundation frame of the Flamingo sitting in the basement, since learning that many Snugseat products, including the Flamingo have been blocked by the FDA from entering the US.  And it's not what you'd think - it has nothing to do with safety concerns.  It is discouraging as this seems to be happening more frequently, causing children with special needs to be forced to wait months or even up to a year to receive equipment they need for daily living and their quality of life.  Does the FDA care?  Nope not one bit.  It is reported that they hope to lift the block by July, which mind you is still almost 6 months away.   Many families have already sought and obtained insurance coverage for these Snugseat products - but now they have to patiently wait.
Love,






Noah's Miracle by Stacy Warden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Sunday, January 26, 2014

The Value of a Life

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                     "If you truly believe in the value of life, you care about about the weakest and 
                               most vulnerable members of society" Joni Eareckson Tada

Having a child with a severe disability gives you an insight to on how people perceive the value of a life.  There have been so many things in the news lately ranging from a parent's right to determine end of life decisions for their child, to those declared medically "brain dead" and the rights of an unborn child, that likely could be born with a disability.  Doctors love to throw around terms, not medically viable, not compatible with life, has no restorative potential, or even will have no quality of life.  Yes these are real terms that myself and so many others like me have personally been told.   You might be an outsider looking in and saying to yourself, gosh those poor parents if only their child had not survived... they'd be so much better off.  But that couldn't be further from the truth.  People are naturally curious and often ask me, are you glad Noah is here with all the difficulties in life that he faces and that you all face as a family?   The answer will always be yes.   A part of me will always be broken.  I can't fix the pain that will has planted itself firmly into the depths of my soul.  I live with an emptiness, a wound that will never heal.  But that wound would be an immense hole in my life had Noah not been revived. 

Perception often is that Noah somehow himself wouldn't want to live like this - in a broken body not capable of talking, crawling, walking or being able to feed himself.  That he isn't happy.  That he lives a miserable existence.  Those are the people who don't know what it is like to hear the laughter in his voice, to experience the innocence of his tender smile, the touch of his hand which feels like a peace of heaven on earth, the joy in his eyes when he accomplishes something he is working on, the excitement he displays over things in his life that he enjoys.  He is worthy of life.  We all are.  We all are deserving of a chance to breath, a chance to live, a chance to thrive, a chance at recovery. 

As a society we have taken out the God factor where hope and faith are silenced.   Words like impossible and never take their place.  We battle for the right for life and death in medical hospitals and courtrooms all across the country. God has no place.  They've edged him out of the equation, trying to extinguish potential for miraculous and even what we used to know as divine intervention.   So what you say - I don't believe in God, miracles, divine intervention... it's all hogwash.  It's because God hasn't yet given you your own personal cross-roads, that fork in the road that forces you to decide will you buy into the theory of never and impossible?  Or will you cling to hope and faith?  Remember to chose wisely there is no going back.

A part of me believes this stems from what people don't understand, what they have not experienced, the fear that is instilled in them.  These perceptions are fed by social and news media encouraging us to focus how we view placing value on lives that are "whole" and "savable." The nature of the human ego says I cannot put myself aside to put another's needs before my own.  Which is rather a key requirement in the land of special needs.  It's a sacrifice that people try to convince you is not worthy of your time and efforts.  And after all who wants to spend money and resources on someone that isn't well... who is less than perfect?  It's just easier to terminate and eliminate the problem - the person who isn't in the eyes of society is no longer "whole." Let's pull the plug they preach... the heart beats, so what the brain isn't fixable... the life growing inside someone else is in a dead body!   A fetus is going to have disabilities, so let's make sure it just doesn't have a chance.  I've personally met some incredibly inspiring children by connecting with other families who have children with special needs.  They all steal a piece of my heart, many of them wouldn't be here if their parents had sold out and believed that these little lives were not compatible with life.  Life is not perfect for any of us, but it's so bittersweet and beautiful at the same time.   We all know that these little lives are so thankful that we believed in them and gave them a chance at life - despite all those who whispered impossible and never in our ears time and time again.   We belong to a club where all things are possible!

My challenge to anyone who reads this blog is to question and challenge the way you think about those with disabilities, those that doctors perceive clinically dead, those that will be born not compatible with life -  the lives medical professionals deem not viable, have no quality of life or restorative potential.  Give consideration to those that are behind these lives giving it everything they have and then some.  This is truly the first step in changing how those with disabilities, illness and inflictions are viewed in this country and all over the world.  Their lives have value - tremendous value.  


Love,



Noah's Miracle by Stacy Warden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Saturday, January 11, 2014

Perspective

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Being a special needs parent is often tremendously lonely.   I've been naive to think that people would share the same priorities that I do.   I have a tendency to feel a deep sense of disappointment with expectations of others as it relates to Noah and our family.  But at the end of the day,  you just have to shake it off and realize that people will either get on your train or you must depart without them. 

I went to the grocery store today, and the cashier asked if I was back to work yet after the holidays.  I explained I likely could never go back to work in the traditional sense as I care full-time for my severely disabled son.  She was from another country, and was trying really hard to comprehend what cerebral palsy meant.  She thought it was a temporary condition.  Which, gosh I wish it was.   But once I explained that Noah was much like having a five year old baby that could not care for himself, she said that he was very lucky God gave him to me because where she comes from they are not permitted to live.  And she wasn't kidding.  She said unspeakable things happen that no one mentions. 

I know that some people have a really had time with phrases like "God doesn't give you more than you can handle,"  or "God chooses special parents for special children."  But those types of thoughts don't upset or bother me.  Because it's rather true, without God knowing the type of person I am and that I'd go the distance for Noah and his needs, where would he be?  In a nursing home because people think he's a family embarrassment?  Adopted because no one thought they could go the distance? Or born in another country where a "damaged" child was deemed not worthy of the gift of life?   The cashier also reminded me how lucky we are to have money, and fresh water, and a safe place to sleep.   How we come from the land of opportunity - which often causes people to do nothing more than wreck themselves and forget what their priorities should really be.   There are some people who inflict upon themselves unnecessary evils and pains who have the power and influence to change their own reality.  Noah doesn't have that luxury.  He cannot change the circumstances of his brain injury.   I cannot forget my purpose and how blessed Noah is to be alive ever.  Every time I look at Noah it is crystal clear where my priorities are.   I suppose we all have to pick what our priorities are - and I can't force or expect someone to join the most important aspect of my life.   Each person has their own lives to live however they see fit. 

After a very challenging day, that cashier gave me a lot of perspective.  I know what defines my life - my authentic self.  The person I am at the very core.  And I'm okay with the idea of God blessing us with allowing Noah to stay because he knew I would go the distance. 

This is an excerpt from the Velveteen Rabbit that tugged at my heart today, giving perspective on what it means to be loved.

Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.'

'Does it hurt?' asked the Rabbit.

'Sometimes,' said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. 'When you are Real you don't mind being hurt.'

'Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,' he asked, 'or bit by bit?'

'It doesn't happen all at once,' said the Skin Horse. 'You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.”
Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit



Love,



Noah's Miracle by Stacy Warden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.